This Is Beautiful: Dance Performance

 Last weekend my dance group had its annual performance. I was really stressed out leading up to it (gestures vaguely) and I wasn't really looking forward to it to be honest. I just had so much else going on. Plus the dress rehearsal wasn't great, I mucked up a bunch of things I normally wouldn't have. Of course, the performance was great and a ton of fun! Things came together, I hit the spots that I was messing up to fix them, and I had a great time. It was a fun affirmation that these artistic communities are so important, and that creating art is such a good time. I am hoping that this isn't my last with the group, but there is the possibility that it is, but I'm so glad that I had this terrific performance if it is.

“Babel” by R.F. Kuang

This is a book that my sister bought me for Christmas, and I’ve slowly been making my way through the stack of books I acquired around then, so I just finished it. And honestly it’s a book that just hit right for me, felt like it was the right time in my life, the correct topics and ideas, and really well done writing. I cannot say enough good things about it, I’ve recommended it already to a bunch of people I know. 

The story follows Robin from when he’s a child in China watching his mother die while he is rescued by Professor Lovell. Lovell takes Robin to England where he is taught Latin and Greek and is funneled into the Babel school at Oxford. There Robin meets Ramy, a similar student who hails from India, and Victorie and Lottie, the other two students in his class. Victorie is a Black woman from Haiti while Lottie is English. Both have to jump through several hoops to be there, the rest of the university doesn’t take women.

Over the course of their studies the four become incredibly close, but Robin harbors a secret that he doesn’t dare share with the others. He met his half brother in town, turns out that his brother (Griffin) was also a student there. He faked his death and now works with the Hermes society to bring Babel down from its colonial purpose. Robin helps him for a while, but they break when Robin demands more information on what he’s doing. Later on Robin learns that Ramy and Victorie were separately recruited and things get tense in their group. They head off to their fourth year trip with Lovell to China, where Robin is devastated to learn that England, and specifically Babel/Lovell are behind it. Robin accidentally kills Lovell, and the coverup that ensues results in all four of them returning to school and reuniting with the Hermes Society.

While at their hideout, they discuss how to stop this war. Anthony, an older student in the Society, serves as a polar opposite to Griffin with his advocacy for swaying public opinion. However, Lottie betrays them and brings the police to the hideout. She shoots Ramy, and the other students are killed as Robin and Victorie are captured. They endure some torture before Griffin breaks them out. Griffin is then shot by a former classmate of his, and Robin and Victorie head back to campus. They hatch a plan to take the tower and call for a strike. As they stop all language work, London starts to grind to a halt. The army is sent in, but unions in the area show up to help them. When it becomes clear that the army cannot be held off any longer, Victorie escapes and heads to America while Robin stays behind to bring the building Babel is in down on his head.

The focus on language in this book I think hit the perfect amount of meta within the story. Of course it is a book, and it’s a written work about the power of language, so there’s a sense of a writer talking about writing and translating. But since language is more so a tool of writing, it doesn’t feel like a direct connection and it allows the story space to make its point. And that’s largely that language is a tool of colonialism that is directly driven by academia. The scholars in Babel are responsible for exploitation of other cultures indirectly and directly as students like Robin, Ramy, and Victorie are brought in from elsewhere. The main magic framework has to do with the power of translation where silver is engraved with 2 words in different languages with imperfect translations. When those two words are spoken, the difference in the words is manifested. London runs on silver, as the strike drags on carriages stop, sewage is stuck, and Westminster Bridge eventually falls.

I found the discussion of academia here really interesting. As someone trying to organize academics right now, so many of these issues are true to life. It is hard to get people to organize when they are told how lucky they are to be there, and how grateful they should be to the school. Lottie betraying the group demonstrates this perfectly where she is discriminated against as a woman, but she also firmly believes in their mission as an English citizen. Leading to her killing Ramy and selling them out. That point of view was such a great inclusion to show that not all marginalized experiences are the same.

The tension between Anthony and Griffin is also interesting as Victorie and Robin take up those places. Robin becomes more convinced that violence is the only way to persuade people, while Victorie wants to succeed but also wants to survive. And I love that it’s the Black woman who manages to make it out and continue the work going forward. I don’t think either stance is totally right, it does require violence but also swaying hearts and minds. It requires thinking about how to act fast and break things and how to plan for the long term.

This is almost certainly going to be one of my favorite books going forward. Tragically it isn’t a series with most of the characters dead, but I do want to read other things by Kuang as well, this is a writer who can speak to the current moment so well that I want to see her capture it again.

This Is Beautiful: In an Unknown Hand

 Last weekend I went to see my friend perform with her early music group. It was in a gorgeous little church and the 5 of them all sang songs that are uncredited but are associated with women's institutions (nuns primarily). They talked about the history and how they transcribed the music as they went so it was fascinating to hear about the work they did as well. And it was a lovely time, the music wasn't overly long like a mass and it just sounded so pretty with the resonance in the church. Plus they got an organist to help out! Great time and great to see a friend do what she studies!

“Precarious Life: The Powers of Mourning and Justice” by Judith Butler

It may surprise you, but I haven’t read much of Judith Butler’s work. And I wanted to change that, so I picked up this book. It’s from the early 2000s and mostly is in reaction to 9/11 and the Iraq War, but it is so stunningly prescient today. The work consists of a few essays by Butler. The first essay talks about how stories shape our politics and who is allowed to have a voice in those stories. The second starts off about mourning and from there discusses how mourning can impact politics and community. The third is a scathing indictment of Guantanamo Bay. The fourth talks about the charge of anti-Semitism when criticizing Israel, and the final essay is the most traditionally philosophical as it discusses Levinas and how that impacts personhood.

Now a lot of these are heavily based in a certain time for sure, but a few really moved me. The essay on mourning I thought was really beautifully written, in that it captured a lot of what I feel I went through with regards to grief and pain. And even the first one I think captured something essential about politics and how people think about global events. But I really wanted to focus on the anti-Semitism essay since that resonates so strongly with the current climate. Butler talks about how people are charged with “essentially” being anti-Semetic, meaning that they don’t intend to be anti-Semetic but the listener charges them with it anyways. And this is a dangerous thing to do as that means that there is no way to prevent the charge and therefore you can say that literally anything is anti-Semetic. And the result is that people are discouraged from criticizing Israel for starters, but also that it detracts from very real and very dangerous actual anti-Semitism going on. Through this, she calls for respect and self-determination for Palestinian people, and for free and open discussion around this topic so that people can contribute without the threat of being called anti-Semetic.

Now this is so important in this day and age as literally nothing has changed! Everything against Israel’s genocide of Palestinians gets labeled anti-Semetic or Hamas or whatever, and people are still terrified of taking a stand because they don’t want to offend Jewish people. Which is so frustrating and ridiculous as people are being bombed and killed. Going through this, it feels as though Butler is talking about 2023 and not 2003. And that is so so sad that nothing has changed in that amount of time.

I also didn’t love all of them, the essay on Guantanamo is good but it’s overly specific to that situation for me to talk about it now. And the final essay has a few too many ideas in it to make sense. But it is simply amazing how much of this was directly applicable to things we are still discussing and thinking about today. I picked this book at random, I didn’t research it or anything, but getting this one glimpse of Butler’s work really makes me want to read the rest of it. I bet they are just as insightful on any number of other topics.

This Is Beautiful: Solidarity

 Well not to dox myself, but the university I attend as a graduate student just ended all DEI programs before anyone asked them to. This is definitely an attempt to spin it as something the current administration is pressuring them into, but there's been talks about this since the fall and it's not fooling me. The administration just wants to consolidate more power in their end and do what they wanted to do all along.

In response, there's been a lot of heartening things taking place. More faculty are trying to learn from the graduate students who have been organizing for ages. And when faculty get fired up, that's when you know it's bad. So the solidarity and determination from everyone has been really encouraging and hopeful. I think this next year(s) is going to be rough, but we will have each others backs throughout it!

“Assassin’s Apprentice” by Robin Hobb

My sister bought me this book for my birthday and I only just now got around to finishing it! It is a pretty good fantasy novel, I really liked the world building and most of the characters. I will say though that it moves pretty slow and the magic system was confusing to me. But as I have read much worse things out there and the writer clearly knows what she is doing, I likely will continue to read the rest of the series.

This book follows Fitz, a bastard of the king-in-waiting from when he is dumped on the castle steps as a child to him growing up and taking on his first big task as an assassin. For most of his childhood he is raised by the stablemaster Burrich. He additionally makes a friend in the dog Nosy, by entering his mind through what we learn is the Will. Burrich though disapproves and when he learns about this he takes Nosy away. Fitz is then discovered to be there by his father’s wife and she takes him under her wing. She has him learn how to fight and write and gifts him another dog. Around the same time, Fitz is visited by Chade, the king’s assassin. He starts to teach Fitz how to sneak around and notice things no one else will. His final teacher though is Galen, the Skillmaster, who teaches him how to use the Skill which is putting ideas into other people’s heads. Galen creates an abusive relationship with all of his students and tries to kick Fitz out until Burrich beats Galen up.

Galen’s final test is to drop all of his students off at mystery locations. Fitz is dropped off at a dangerous place that he isn’t expected to return from, but he gets word from his dog that Burrich is being attacked and he manages to rush home. Burrich realizes that Fitz knew by using the Will on the dog and ceases to associate with him. Then Fitz gets the order to accompany the new prince to his wedding and kill the bride’s older brother to ensure that the bride is the sole heir to her kingdom. He gets there and the prince is in perfect health, not sickly as he was told. He starts to doubt his mission, even more so when the princess reveals that she knows he’s an assassin and attempts to poison him. Fitz protests against his orders but is told by the king and the prince’s younger brother to stay firm. So he goes to confront the bride’s brother, he puts the poison in the wine, but unbeknownst to him the wine was already poisoned and the bride’s brother dies. Fitz is arrested, Nozy reappears as an old dog and chews through his bonds and Burrich supports Fitz to confront the prince’s brother. He attempts to kill both Burrich and Fitz, Fitz is only saved by Nosy dragging him from the pool he was supposed to drown in, killing Nosy in the process. Meanwhile there is an attempt on the prince’s life but Fitz finally uses the Skill to warn him, and they head home. Fitz is barely alive, Burrich is also severely injured, but peace is maintained in the kingdom.

Now my main complaint with this book is that the magic systems are very confusing. I had no idea what the difference is between the Will and the Skill for most of the book. And I’m still a little confused, but I think the Will is animals and the Skill is people potentially. Which makes Burrich’s reaction to the whole thing a little ridiculous as he encourages Fitz with the Skill and hates the Will. But ok we learn as we go and that’s fine.

The other complaint is that it moves pretty slowly. Fitz primarily hears about things going on elsewhere in the kingdom while he studies or something. He likes a girl in town but doesn’t make any moves. The Fool pops in and out but there’s a lot going on in there that we don’t know. The politics of the situation primarily aren’t revealed until the last second when it feels like I’m struggling to keep up. I’m hopeful that it speeds up though, introducing a world can take time.

Having said all that, I do really like the world and the characters. Burrich is charming and the Fool is delightful. Fitz is a bit annoying, but not in a way that makes me hate him. The characters like the princess that we meet at the last moment I hope stick around as there aren’t enough women here (but there never is in fantasy). Hobb so clearly knows what she is doing that even when the going gets frustrating, I still want to keep going.

And keep going I will, I am trying to get my hands on the second book in the trilogy and am looking forward to reading it!

This Is Beautiful: Muppets Amigurumi

 So a few days ago a friend texted that she found The Muppets Official Crochet Amigurumi at the local library and I knew I had to get my hands on it. So I requested it and picked it up the next day. It is delightful! All of the main Muppets are here, and based on the pictures anyways, they look very similar to the real deal. Nothing worse than being interested in a pattern but the eyes look terrifying or the colors are all off. 

I'm so excited, I fully intend to work my way through the whole book eventually, but starting with Kermit for now. It'll definitely take a while, but it's so energizing to have a new project to be working on!