Reasons Why The Music For Some Musicals Just Sucks

So there are a ton of musicals out there, and some are going to be better than others. But what I want to talk about here is some musicals that most people are big fans of that I literally cannot stand. Because what I’m really focusing on here is the music, since that’s really what I’m paying attention to and that’s really what stays stuck in your head for weeks after the show.

First of all, there’s Andrew Lloyd Weber. Now I like “The Phantom of the Opera” as much as the next person, but it has everything to do with the plot and not with the music. (Also “Evita” is so much worse than “Phantom”.) He must consistently run out of ideas halfway through writing the music because every song has the same theme, the same melody, and the only thing that varies are the words or the accompaniment. The entire show sounds like monotony as a result, exactly the opposite of what you want a musical to be. And “Evita” is an opera, so there’s no talking involved, which makes it even worse because all you get is the “Don’t Cry for Me Argentina” melody for about two hours. And even then, there is very little flow to the music, it’s like he’s throwing darts at the staff and putting down notes where the darts land. Long story short, Weber has very little creativity.

And then there’s the problem that a lot of modern, rock musicals fall into. They come up with a decent plot, and then the music just isn’t memorable. It sounds as though they took monologues and set it to a beat. Musicals are supposed to become earworms and have clever lyrics, that’s what audiences remember them for.

But of course, they all get a cult following anyway because of the subject matter. They nearly all deal with some sort of issue that becomes a tearjerker. (Note: this doesn’t apply to all of these musicals. “Hedwig and the Angry Inch” or “RENT” are amazing. To contrast, “Next to Normal” is not.)

So what you really need for a good musical are composers who actually put thought into the words and music, and don’t just take the lazy way out. You would think that this would be obvious, but it very obviously isn’t.