“Redefining Realness” by Janet Mock

If you want to be a successful ally to trans people, then the first step is to educate yourself. And one of the best ways to go about doing that is to read their stories and acknowledge their hardships. Mock’s story is honest and powerful, and told in such a way where she includes the stories of those around her, noting where her experiences aren’t typical of the greater trans community.

Providing the context to her story is crucial, as right now we need more intersectionality in our portrayal of LGBTQ+ community. Many high-profile trans people are white and upper-class, which unintentionally erases the stories of anyone who does not fit that description. Mock is of mixed-race, and grew up without that much money. Even so, she still acknowledges that there are many trans youths that did not have a supportive family like she did, and cites statistics frequently.

She also critiques our treatment of trans individuals in contemporary society. Valuing those who “pass” more than those who do not look cis-gender (cis refers to those that identify with the gender they were assigned at birth) creates a notion that trans individuals are trying to pretend to be something they are not. This is a false notion, since there is no one way to be a woman and no one way to express that identity. She also discusses how the burden of “coming out” and letting everyone know that you are trans is often heaped on the trans individual, again seen as living a lie, and people are angry when they find out that they have been lied to. But this is ridiculous, trans people are just trying to live their lives, they are not responsible for telling their life’s story to everyone that they meet.

In all honestly, this is one of the most eye-opening books that I’ve read. Mock discusses being trans, female, mixed-race, sex workers, and many other things through her tale. Her pathway is full of hope and lessons that anyone can learn and grow from. Now, more than ever, we need to listen to those members of marginalized communities (such as trans people) that can make themselves heard and support them through whatever means we can. Because the government certainly isn’t.