“I’m Glad My Mom Died” by Jennette McCurdy

I remember being aware that this book was coming out, I had loved iCarly when I was young and I was glad to see a child actor growing up. I picked it up finally because I was between books from the library and it was available as an ebook. I ended up absolutely loving it, McCurdy’s voice comes through so strongly and is so funny, plus it’s fascinating to see what was going on behind the scenes in her life the entire time I was seeing her on screen.

McCurdy starts with a segment of her mom is the hospital in a coma, and her trying to wake her up by saying she finally hit 89 pounds (essentially through anorexia). Flashback to her as a kid, growing up in a hoarder household where she lived to please her mother and make her happy. When her mother suggests that she act, she can’t say no. As she grows up, her mother encourages her to stop eating in order to make her small. She grows to hate acting and after iCarly, hates fame. Her friendship with Miranda Cosgrove, her co-star, is very real though. Her mom does have a cancer relapse and eventually died. And eventually, McCurdy gets help and starts to take a closer look at her relationship and mythology around her mom.

What I really love about this book is that it has all of the messy stuff about recovery. I haven’t read a ton of recovery memoirs to be fair, but there are plenty of anecdotes where I can remember how it looked on the outside, but she supplies the harsh reality of what she felt on the inside. So it may specifically resonate with folks that saw her on tv as a kid. It doesn’t gloss over the details and I so appreciate McCurdy for that.

Additionally, it is really harrowing to hear about what child actors go through. I mean I’ve heard all of the stories and whatever, but reading about it happening to her is something else. I am always so amazed by what they were able to get away with over at Nickelodeon (and Disney as well I assume). In the book she is offered 300 thousand dollars to never talk about her experiences, and she turns it down. She also turns down the reboot of the show. And good for her, or we might not have had this book.

This was such an entertaining, enjoyable read. I was rooting for McCurdy the whole time and really enjoying hearing her voice. And I’m just glad she’s in a better place now.