Alright well similarly to my last post, I finally told my partner that I'm struggling more than I thought with caretaking. And that I felt bad and that he deserved a better caretaker. He was incredible about it, and said that I was doing amazingly even if I feel like I'm not. Caretakers don't have to be perfect, you just have to get the job done.
I'm not sure what I expected, but that was so reassuring that I feel a lot better now. Probably should have done that earlier, but oh well.
Caretaking is so much harder than I thought it'd be. This is going to be an incoherent post since I'm still sorting it all out and haven't had much time, but that's the general idea.
I genuinely love taking care of my partner, but since he's had surgery it's been difficult. I think I ended up being much more worried about him than I thought I'd be. Any type of surgery is scary, even ones with a low probability of issues.
I also realized how much time it takes up. He does a lot around the house and now I have to do it all! Not that I didn't appreciate it before, but I didn't fully internalize that I'd be doing the work of two people.
And it creates a sort of strange power dynamic. Your partner is supposed to be your equal, and now I'm looking after him and worrying about him. It's an adjustment for sure.
I'll probably have more fleshed out thoughts at some point in the future, but for now, that's what's going on.
I finally popped open my Steam account and downloaded the sequel to "Arcade Spirits" that I've been waiting for all this time. I am not very far into it, but I already adore the game!
One great improvement over the original is the amount of customization. You can pick your name, nickname, pronouns (from many options), body type, clothing, and you even get to design your rival! It's really cool especially to see all of the pronoun options, there's the typical he, she, they, but also many more like fae, ze, it, etc. What great queer representation!
Then there's the characters. These have always been the strength of visual novels like these. I immediately fell in love with Grace, a wonderful Black lady scientist. She just resonates with me so much as a fellow scientist. Then there's Locksley, who was clearly inspired by Robin Hood. Robin Hood in the legends is originally from Locksley, plus the character wears a green hoodie and is a rogue game repairer who values justice and fairness. I'm obsessed. Plus there's a super cool disabled character, Jynx, who I also love. And others, but those are the main ones so far.
I'm so excited to see how the story unfolds and how the game mechanics come to life like the original. Here we go!
I'm veeeery slowly making my way through this pile of free ebooks that I've been able to download from Tor.com each month. I think this one was from back in March, haha. But I finally finished it.
Witchmark is a book set in what I think is a fantasy, alternate reality England where witches exist and specifically shape the weather. The witches themselves are divided into two groups, there's the Primaries who are able to sing and control magic through their voice, and the Secondaries who are typically seen as support and are forced to bind themselves to a Primary and give their power to them. The protagonist is Miles Singer, a Secondary who ran away from home to become a physician rather than be bound as a servant. He has been making a life for himself, until he has a patient who is another witch. He dies, but not before telling Miles that he was murdered. The bulk of the plot is a murder mystery as Miles tries to chase down the killer. Along the way he meets Tristan, a mysterious person who intrigues Miles and clearly also has an aptitude for magic. (Queer romance incoming!) And Miles' sister Grace eventually finds him and Miles' past finally catches up with him.
There's so much to love about this book. There's a gay romance that's really sweet and lovely, and it gest into aspects of classism and racism that are relevant to our contemporary society. For example, witches of a lesser social standing are persecuted in this reality, for no reason other than the fact that they are poor. Miles comes to this realization partway through the book, with Tristan's help. I think having that perspective of someone who is slowly realizing that the system is rigged is really helpful for those who are experiencing a similar realization in real life.
My main complaint is that the politics of this world are super complicated. It turns out that the witch leadership and the mortal leadership are both all tied up in this murder and different people profit and gain power from the status quo. I couldn't really keep up with the logic, who was doing what, things like that. But I just kept going and you get the gist of it really. I imagine though if you keep reading the rest of the series that it all comes back in the end.
Having said that, this book stands on its own really well, and feels like a complete story. I might check out the rest, probably not, but maybe if I stumble on it. I did really like the characters and the world that I was introduced to, it just felt so complete and wrapped up entirely. I'm not intending it as a complaint, it's rare that you don't see a series that promotes later books, but it does mean that I won't go out of my way to read the next one. All that to say, check out this book! The first of this series is really incredible.
The performances are now open for Shakespeare in the Arb's production of "A Midsummer Night's Dream" in which I'm playing Puck! It's so nice to be performing again, especially in such a gorgeous setting and with such a fun character.
It's exhausting, don't get me wrong, but there's also something so energizing about it. Part of it is certainly that I have to do this physical work, but it's also so fun and joyous. I'm really glad that I did this and am part of this performance.
Happy Pride, but just to everyone who doesn't feel fully part of the queer community!
I've been planning a huge experiment for MONTHS and have just run into all of these setbacks. But I finally did it last Friday and now it's going! We'll know in a few weeks how it came out.
It's not the usual "this is beautiful" subject, but honestly I've felt so good since that got done that this counts for me haha.
