“Gender Outlaw” by Kate Bornstein

I recently finished Gender Outlaw (importantly the more recent edition that has been edited) since it has been on my list of books to read for a while. I thought it was a really interesting book! So much of it really resonated strongly with me, which I was surprised as I often feel like a lot of the trans community can disagree about these things. It helps that Bornstein was writing this as a way to say that we don’t need gender, which she then updated to we don’t need any gender that restricts us, and I vibe with that a lot as someone that doesn’t fall into the gender binary.

It is interesting to read this now though, a lot of the terminology is out of date. Which she recognizes throughout the book, this is more a snapshot of the time than a definitive, up-to-date book. Which I don’t mind, I get what she’s saying. One example being that she talks about how bisexuality and androgyny are these midpoints that reinforce the binary. Which I think would be seen now as rather biphobic, bisexuality doesn’t inherently mean attraction to men and women. Often it means attraction to self and other, or to 2 genders (and take your pick of the 2). And I recently started identifying as an androgyne, someone who has a lot of masculine and feminine qualities. I don’t see that as a midpoint between the two but rather a blending into something new. But it just shows how tricky these words are and how much they change over time.

I also really enjoyed that there’s a whole script that Bornstein wrote about gender included in the book. I think it’s so interesting that many queer and trans people are drawn to theater as that allows you to perform as something you are not. It can be a way to try on different labels and experiences as a result! And theater can be really transgressive and force the audience to think about gender and performance differently. It’s very cool.

More than anything else though, I was really struck by how relevant the discussion about labels is. Bornstein discourages getting attached to any one label as they can all change and grow. Somehow this is years after and we still need more of this! I guess it is part of human nature to want to belong to a specific category, but the queer community as a whole can still embrace its fluidity so much more, stop the infighting, and just accept each other for who we are at the time. That aspect still hasn’t changed.

This was such an interesting book, and it still resonates so deeply with what is going on in the contemporary culture. I would say read it to both see where we are coming from as a community, but also where we need to go. It’s so insightful to both aspects of queer culture.